Will it be lonely this Christmas…?
New Years is often thought of as a time for togetherness and celebration, but rarely is it spoken about the fact that this time of year tends to be a prime time to trade in your partner.
There will be many people for different reasons spending Christmas and New Year’s if not alone but feeling it, and they need to know they aren’t alone. For some reason this time of years stirs up people’s emotions and ahead of a fresh new year encourages people to revaluate their personal relationships. We spoke to one Mojacar resident about splitting with a partner at Christmas time;
Radio 1 even used to announce their ‘Relationship Transfer Deadline Day’ claiming that it was ‘too harsh’ to dump your partner after the 10th December and anyone in a relationship at this point must remain this way until 5th January, because ‘No one likes a Christmas dumping.’
“I was aware that it may have looked like I stayed in the relationship for the present, since we split on Boxing Day, but the truth is I just had the overwhelming feeling that I did not want to spend any more time with this person. I couldn’t envisage spending another Christmas with my now ex-partner therefore it felt important to me to take control of my life going into a new year with a fresh start.”
A positive start to a New Year would be to plan something enjoyable and fun to do, either alone or with friends, schedule it for the end of January or start of February so that you have something to look forward to. Some people suffer from the post-Christmas blues, and even though we seem less affected here in Spain since the climate is more agreeable and the festivities roll onto January with the Three Kings, it still isn’t a bad idea to get something in the diary as a ‘pick me up.’
The good news is that spending the festive season single means no awkward meals with the in-laws or the obligatory dilemma over what to get for their dad, brother or cousin. It leaves you free to please yourself, especially since you don’t know how long you’ll be able to do that for – the following Christmas you might be right into the swing of a new relationship. So, whilst you can, make the most of being able to do more or less as you please. The general consensus is that being single in the festive season can actually be a lot of fun if you plan out things to do. This is not the time to sit in and dwell on things, the best thing is to do things that uplift you, it helps to surround yourself with like-minded people. Plus, if you would like to meet someone, you have much more chance if you’re out and about giving yourself more opportunity to meet someone. It’s also a great time of year to join a dating site.
A shocking number of singles has broken with a partner before the holidays to avoid buying them a gift
Do not even be tempted to wallow in self-pity. Of course, it’s healthy to sit with your feelings and accept them, but be aware when you’re unnecessarily torturing yourself. You don’t need to be thinking about couples wearing matching jumpers or kissing under the mistletoe. People gravitate towards happy people, being miserable won’t make you feel better, or anyone else. Make an effort to be involved, whether that be inviting an old friend out for a drink, playing a board game with a relative or taking a friend’s child to look at Christmas lights.
Whatever you do this Christmas remember that we all deserve to have a good time, if you have people who love you and food on the table you’re luckier than you might think.